surprisebitch:

dating tip: ask them to show you their recently used emojis so you can count your matches and see if you are compatible

(Source: surprisebitch)

s-c-i-guy:

Reaching that point during your semester whenimage

dashdrive:

how many whats until you give up on trying to hear what the person is saying

I really hate when I put food in the microwave and it starts popping and making explosive noises so I check it and it’s freezing cold like why you gotta play me like that

verticulars:

If you can’t deal with my sarcasm. I can’t deal with being your friend. 

(Source: verticulars)

uglyvevo:

i wish noah had swatted the two mosquitoes from his ark

(Source: sadden)